The Junior show

Wow. So. First half of senior year has FWOOSH gone by. It's a very scary thought, when I think about how much work I must yet do for my film, and what is waiting for me out in the world.

I know I am personally not ready for the working world. I don't have enough experience, and even though I've had several internships, they've not been enough. I've been left behind a little I feel. My friends have gotten interns and connections with pat smith and signe baumen and bill plympton. ROCK ON for them, its really awesome.

Still, my internships have been beyond valuable to me. I've learned alot about life, work, and work relationships (you know, as well as animating HA).

I've got this real big thirst to always learn more though. I've been this way since I was young. hAhaa. I am such a geek. =) But I mean, when you have these things you are passionate about, its good to want to pursue them and get better at them.

And Mike Manley is a freaking awesome teacher. I don't care if people disagree. That man is someone who I can relate to very much.

Junior Show is tomorrow. I'm being a ninja senior and sneaking something in. *gasp*

Sergio Pablos rocks. ( As well as numerous other animators)

Lately I have been going through a slightly rough state in the sense of my art. I know everything takes a lot of hard work, and such- but I have been wandering between somewhere between discontent and self-doubt.

Which everyone does- let us face this. I am pretty sure this is due to an analysis of my own work that is not self deprecating- but actually true. And because of this I have a sense of being unable to overcome the goals and flaws in my own work.

I simply must press on and work hard hard harder than I have ever done. I must push myself like I always do, and like an amazing artist/teacher has told me, I must truly be a fascist with myself. What is the POINT of doing what I am doing if I DONT love it? If I can't bear with forcing the iota of strength left within me through my pencil and onto paper?

Really, this is less than a rant then getting myself motivated.
- Nothing like some awesome disney work to motivate, as well. ( SAY WHAT YOU LIKE- they are those who push themselves and their work to heights many cannot claim. They have flaws as well-but I will proudly claim my love for those animators)

Still Alive

Yes. I am a horrible blogger. I have fallen into the "rarely updates" mode. But, eh. I'm busy, so bare with me. Even though I know there are really no people who read my blog. O_o.

This is a random pencil test of keys I made, modeling after a Glen Keane scene where the beast stands up, now human. Its such an emotional scene, and his animation is so incredible. Mine pales VERY MUCH in comparison.

Done on threes.

New Attempts

Look. I made this. Woooow. Vee trying COLLAGE. and whats this, DIGI-COLLAGE!?
This was alot of fun- but done with a ridiculously crappy-not-full-version of corel. SO I couldnt flatten anything and hade 50+ layers. Thus the overall same tonal quality in the piece. I really like mister wolf there.

Also- Red needs some muffins in that basket or something.

I will live each day with Passion! 私は情熱毎日住んでいる!

I am going to be serious, right now. None of this is meant to insult anyone, whoever ends up seeing this-but bring forth my frustrations in myself and in the "common" art of today. This subject may seem silly to some, may invigorate others, and hopefully will bring light to all the artists I know and love.

How many times a day do we commit to our work, do we truly reach into the deep depths of our very beings and dig around for the gut wrenching, emotional circumstances that make us who were are? How often is it that we can finish an piece of artwork and not feel both emotionally enlightened and suffocated all at once!? Where does the passion of being come from and go to within us- are we fully listening to ourselves as Creators, as Life-Givers, as Artists?

Or are we just skimming the surface:Are we placing false works before us and feeling accomplished because of our technical prowess? Sloshing out pieces that are copies or half interpretations of another's magic? Slapping around paints or words, or lyrics that are "catchy" or "popular". What Ever happened to the voice behind our hearts that claws at our throats and fingertips for release?

Where are our Muses? Where is our passion and dedication?

Perhaps I am hasty in including all artists in this. Mayhaps I am venting my own frustrations of self-searching onto you. But can you honestly look around you at the artwork you see commonly and be simply...okay with diving into a crowd of sameness? My friends have talent, we all have talent- and I love you all for your shining examples of unique-ness! I APPLAUD YOU FOR YOU.

But now I challenge you. I CHALLENGE YOU- right here and now, to commit yourself to your life, to your self given slavery, to yourself as your art possesses of you. Let yourself get carried away in its passions, as wretchedly blissful as they are.

Niavete or wisdom, take these words as you will. Yet I must vent this feeling building up inside me.

Recent Updates

Classes start today for me, even though I get the easy end of the stick. One class today, and none tomorrow, so I get an early weekend. YAY! Only, I am a weird person and have always been, and am actually disappointed I don't have classes right away. I have always enjoyed learning and discovering new things.

Next Friday I will be leaving for North Carolina until the following Saturday, so yay for vacations!.. Even though classes just started. HA. My family plans things silly.

I thought I'd share some of my favorite music with you all. I love the Japanese composer Joe Hisaishi. If you have seen any of Miyazaki-san's films you are familiar with him. I especially love The Tarara Workwoman's Song. Unfortunately, you cannot find this on youtube, but if you ever watch Princess Mononoke, it is in the iron melding rooms that it is sung. It is very short, but full of honor and pride. I also love Mononoke Hime- the theme and main song for the film Mononoke Hime (Princess Mononoke) which is here, although this particular singer is not my favorite. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIfsbYvz6nQ


Also- Here is this. O_o. It was created for a compilation for the Autumn Society, to help get my name out there. Joe Game set this up to help the community, which is pretty awesome of him, and with only spending 5 bucks to get into a small collection to be passed out to people at the Baltimore Comic Con this year. Sweetness in a can.

Fox Spirits and Bad Scans

Just sharing some bad scans from one of my new sketch books. I am completely awful at scanning. I scanned each one of these, viewing them, and decided they were cut just how i wanted them... when somehow the finished scan is completely NOT what I intended. However, I am too lazy to rescan them, when I'm not going to use them for anything except.. this.

This is the cover of my book, with my Inari on it. I love drawing foxes, and often times my foxes have little clown arrows around their eyes, so I decide that this particular character would be my Muse, Inari (Inari is a Japanese shinto fox god/goddess).

^The pose is mimicking "Okami" but i'm not sure I got it completely right.

More Inari-s and bad scans. Working with pens this time. =O

I also have a black sense of humor. Poor snail (muahaha)

Awful scan number 4! Wandering post-apocolyptic desert family. One of my better successes at drawing cartoon-children.

At some point I'll post something that actually makes my art look good!!! And is not a crappy scan. <3

Simple talk

Not much happening these days. That's not necessarily a bad thing, I just wish I could get some form of work. Everyone I know has some type of commissioned work or etc. that they are doing, and thats awesomely exciting for them! And all I'm really doing is working on storyboards and keeping myself busy with Video games/ art tests like this one here.

This is not anything fancy, just a test of the "taper" sumi-e in Corel Painter. Had some fun with it, but couldn't get her nose correct =/. meh. tests are test =)


Ha! I wish I had the patience for traditional cross-hatching by hand, but its never been my forte. Although... practice makes... well, nobody's perfect, but it certainly makes an artist improve herself!!


Also- Recently been watching GARGOYLES series all over again. oh the goodness. OH. THE. GOODNESS. Seriously folks. Their ears even have secondary action. Woosh.

Oh Greg Weisman.

The Princess and the Frog Teaser

OOOkkaaaaay. Disney has released a teaser for its upcoming film (Not sure when about its release, but I've been pumped for this 2D film since I've heard about it).

Looks... interesting. Not enough to go by to say it 'll be good, but another 2D film reaching the market its... a gateway to possibly more. So, enjoy this 30 second teaser!

http://disney.go.com/disneypictures/princessandthefrog/

Portfolio

Talk of Great Things

I figured I should touch upon some of the wonderful films I have seen while in France, during the Annecy Film Festival.

A wonderful french film was featured, entitled Tous a L'Ouest: Un Aventure de Lucky Luke. (To the West! An Lucky Luke Adventure). It was funny and engaging, with plenty of slapstick humor and a storyline both children and adults could appreciate. Set in America during the early 1900's, it revolves truly around four brothers in crime, and their attempt to swindle and overcome the lackadaisical cowboy, Lucky Luke fastest draw in all of the U.S. I wasn't so impressed with the film, although I did enjoy it. I felt there was an exceeding amount of 3-D models used for things like cars and wagons and horses. This wouldn't have been such a problem for me if they hadn't firstly stuck out like a sore thumb in the 2-d world, and if ALSO they were different colored models that perhaps weren't synchronized with each other. I mean, come on people, its not hard to mess up the timing so everything doesnt look robotic! All in all I gave the movie a C, though I know I'll get kicked for it.

I also got to see the beautiful Nocturna, which is a film I have been simply itching to see. Unfortunately, I scheduled myself , unwittingly, to see the French version of this films and it had no subtitles. I was however, able to use my rudimentary french to understand the most of it. I also believe the clear visuals helped me to understand exactly how each character felt, and the acting was wonderful. The visionary world of Nocturna is dark and wonderful, and I was in love with it, even if the story was perhaps not the deepest out there. Honestly folks, though, I can appreciate simple storylines, and why shouldn't I? I felt much more attached to this feature than any I had seen, and I give it a B+, A-.

Though I regret not seeing it, the winner of feature film at Annecy was Die Drei Rauber. I have heard wonderful things about this film, and I intend to see it. It apparently is off of the folk tale, the three robbers. This film I have been told is hysterical for all its upbeat kooky-ness, and also a touching film at that. It centers around a young girl who is "abducted" by three robbers, who end up becoming closely like family to her, and take care of her. I believe it ends up that the four of them attempt to free orphans from the awful clutches of some terrible lady at an orphanage... That's really long winded and all I know. Anyway- Three Cheers for DIE DREI RAUBER winning the feature crystal. <3>

Sleep is for the week!

Yes. Apparently.

I have not had any official work to do for about three days now, but for the past five I've been putting pencil to paper nonstop. Currently I am in the starting stages of concept art for my Senior Thesis Film. YAY ANIMATION!

Here, I will share some with you. The below is Logan Brady, a design for the main character of my film about ..well.. dead people. Haha. He's a ghost, and though the story is still sketchy, the film is about life in the afterlife. Mostly a serious piece about what he should do now that he's dead to become.. well.. he doesn't know. he thought it was the end.

I am making it sound light hearted, it's actually not. It's going to be a deep piece about humanity, be it in life or death.


As i design him I am also beginning massive research for his background and for the story.
I believe it will be set in both 1925 and modern times. He died in 1925 ( HAHA! NOW YOU KNOW WHY I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR 1920's INFO FOR SO LONG!)
and yeah. I can't decide if I want him to be a prick, selfish, or a selfish prick. But.. I believe in characters not being orange or blue (black and white is boring, lets go with Different opposing colors, okay?) so hes character development has just begun.

blah blah blah. Full of drive. I am not an excellent blogger because I still feel like I'm talking to myself, which I am.

Also, breakfast soon. mmmm breakfast.

Jamie Baker rocks.

Everything here is on the up and up.
I figure that would be the first thing to say coming back from a moderate hiatus. My piece is finished and everything seems to be going swell.

Check it out. Found James Baker's blog, and hes got lots of nice connections to other Pixar employee's blogs as well. Click the button. But after you read this. You love me more.
http://www.james-baker.com/folio/

actually it's all really just mindless drivel, but nonetheless, stay here and toss a few words around with me, yo.

France in a few weeks. Yeah. that will be nice, as long as my plane doesn't blow up. If it does, seriously, come to my funeral in the craziest, zaniest hat you can find. Only the cool kids will do it.


Unrelatedly, don't trust smiling men with lobsters on their heads. They are neither men nor lobsters, and therefore are lying cads who cannot be trusted.
DON'T DO IT.

Okay serious time folks.
I am blown away by the amazing artists in this world who never give up a day without drawing and or releasing their inhibitions onto paper or film, or what have you. I know I draw everyday, but that's nothing in comparison to the work some people are pouring out. To all of you who are living your life like this, I ADORE YOU.

also, for those nerds who would like to join me in the mass of nerd-dom that is known as anime lovers, is an interesting website that displays model sheets from various anime.
http://www.catsuka.com/gengal.php

New images will be posted soon I suppose. Need to scan some stuff.

^ quick digi-light study.

Silly me

I let myself get my hopes up just a teeensy bit.
Yesterday my Chairman for the animation department asked who was interested in internships with Pixar. I jumped on it.
He gave me a print out of information he received.... back in MARCH.
So, of course, when I went to their site, they were not accepting any residencies or interns. =/
I are sad.
However, Now I have the website =) So I'll keep checking, and maybe attempt to get one after I graduate?

Still unsure what I am to be doing... do I try for my MFA?

Random musings. Getting back to work now.

yeaaah. I need to do some work.

I've done maybe 900 frames out of the 1800 that I need to have done for the 12th.

Since when have I ever not done work when I needed to?
Yes, I am getting things done, but it's taking much more.. forcefulness on my part.
I need to stop being a slacker.

However, I have been drawing alot again. For a few weeks there my sketch book went barely touched, graced only by the scratch of a pencil for classwork. However, I now present you with an atrocious redesigning of a wonderful character that Mr. David Lloyd would probably spasm with pain if he ever saw it.


I couldn't help it. I love him. Is it because of the namesake we share? Or the crazed revolutionary anarchist that is lovably radical? Or is it the fact that he is a philosophical bookworm who quotes Macbeth and uses wonderfully verbose vernacular in the form of consonance...?

Yeaaah it's all of those.
I wish I had made him more... manly..? I guess. He looks like he has new boots and is questioning "How do I look?"
However, I tried to incorporate as many V's into his design as possibly. Also, his mask has slight alterations to make it more angular.

Uhm... Yeah.
Still searching for those damn comics, too. I can buy them on e-bay and amazon... but...not the same as getting it straight out of a comic store. Worse comes to worse, I'll get it off the internet soon. I just want a good quality copy.

Wow. I am...a nerd.
I need to devote my time to more constructive things.
Like saving the enviornment.

RECYCLE DAMN YOU!

perhaps you won't bother.

There are so many things wrong with this country. With the way things are being run, with what people are allowing to happen... Is this the Vietnam War all over again?

Then why is no one rising up and protesting LOUDLY for peace. SO many people sacrificed themselves and their reputations to put an end to needless massacre.
Am I too going to stay on the side lines?

I will honestly tell you, I did not vote the other day. Why? I had the opportunity, maybe I dont live in Philly, but that doesn't matter. I didn't try to do anything.

And, personally, on a bigger issue... what about my art? My characters, my ideas? They are selfishly naive- Just like so much of the art being produced and shipped around the states these days. All we ever do is try to escape our own fears... and maybe that isn't so bad. But...to purposefully blind ourselves, to look away from those people who need standing up for? For the war that is going on that we created from thin air? The government and those people who can lie in the face of thousands, proclaiming and disguising conquest and imperialistic capitalism in the name of Justice, Freedom, and Equality? WELL WHOSE EQUALITY? WHOSE JUSTICE? WHAT FREEDOM? We are bound by shackles and deafened to the cries of so many tortures. I mean, not just the war. What about the wastefulness of society?

I am sitting here, in a 12x10 foot room with a television on blasting family guy, the hum of my computer and the buzz of the lights above me shouting slothfulness.

I sit here in my frozen legs and do nothing but wish for the courage to do something.

I am truly pathetic.
What is the point of having a voice, if you say nothing?
Mon coeur puet suelement prendre tellement.

Hey there, wish me luck.

Okay, so in roughly twelve hours I will be setting up my gear in CBS auditorium and going head to head against an altogether WAY TOO AMAZING artist and then roughly six hours after that I will be congratulating him on winning the award we are dueling for.

There will be samurai swords and bloodshed. be there.

Just kidding, although I seriously am nervous. A friend of mine and myself got nominated for an award, and tomorrow our work goes against a panel of judges at 1130 am. He's totally going to win, because he seriously IS the best thing since sliced bread, while I am merely the best thing since cockroaches. Or a step below. HOWEVER there is no way I am going down without a fight. *fiery eyes*.. so yeah ^_^.

If you want a sample.. the opening to my demo reel. you don't necessarily need to watch it. However, if you do, tell me what you think of it? *glittery eyes*



Also- Check out another awesome animator to be added to my side list of awesome-ness

www.etoli.net
this is the art and animations of Kelli Davis. She makes pretty things and has a beautiful imagination.

Vuelva al dolor de usted

bah. hopefully my spanish still works and that title is what i mean.

Anyway. Writing about Pedro Almodovar for my Spain after Franco class. I am not a huge fan now, but I definately appreciate this project for letting me know about him. His work is beautiful, and I appreciate his subtleties and genuine knowledge of women that is honestly not present in many films, or even in many films directed by women themselves.

I am absolutely in love with Estrella Morenta because of him, and the film, Volver. Listening to it over and over and over. Here, watch a clip from youtube being lip-sung by Penelope Cruz.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=cFr4zI2tcyY

the whole song is much better, and so heartfelt. I love flamenco. However, this clip is pretty, and the overall film amazing. Go watch it. Although, perhaps men will not appreciate it as much as women, not to be sexist, it's just a very obviously female film.

Work has essentially halted completely on my project, which is no good. However- I have been working on my Avatar Scene and some character designs for classes. After tonight I will resume work and slave over my projects like normal.

For now, I will sit here typing my paper and singing through my heart. =)

Finding Friends in Awesome Artists

Blah blah blah.

I'm 21 now, my birthday was on the 13th. Blah blah. Older.

Mmmm. =/

Here- Eureka Seven style Kai... who is a character of mine. crappy. enjoy.

Saw a very cool, talented artist I know today in Borders- Joe Game. Did some research and dug up his Autumn Society site (features artists like Bryan Brinkman as well) and also his Chogrin site. For any of those of you millions of people who are spotting this world, go check him out- He's really talented and his art is slick. He's on the Little side-bar over there. Yeah. click it.

Mmmm.

I wish I could spend more time developing lots of things I want to say, but I have to do some things which require time which I do not have.

Lots of love to all of you.

Empathy for Earth-kind.

Fancy meeting you here...

Mmmmmmmm. =)

Happy, but I should be working. I got a little teeny bit of work done today, I'll regret it later. The avatar storyboards are done. So... yeah. Tons more excited to work on that project then my poem-animation. But I need to find motivation. I hate feeling like I don't want to work, because then the question rises- If I don't want to work on what I enjoy doing, why do it at all? I know everyone goes through ups and downs, but I've never been a person who actually understood not working on a project until you ENJOY it.

Mayhop-haps I am just a strange one.
Who loves work.

Other things very obviously don't get enough attention when you are a work-a-holic however.
=/...I can't help it. I'm in love with art.

So... yeah. I just need to push past this little "don't wanna" bump and get things done.

ALSO- 48 DAYS UNTIL I LEAVE FOR FRANCE!!!! So excited for the Annecy trip and Angouleme workshop. Yes. ^_^ I get to work with British and French students to make a piece... COPACETIC!
Something not so copacetic- http://money.cnn.com/2008/04/09/news/companies/airline_cancellations/index.htm?

Totally bummer, hopefully won't interupt me going to France.
HOWEVER- this has me totally freaking out because of the massive nightmares I've been having recently, nightmares detailing extremely realistic flight failures with fire, burning flesh, and taking icy dives into bubbling, black water.

I'm nervous =(.

Everyone has bad days

A little bit of a frustrating day.
Which is unsettling for me. I still have some of my drive to work, but more and more of it is dissipating. I have not yet started animating for my Junior interdisciplinary piece, and I fear idleness.

ALTHOUGH- this little snippet right here I am going to convert and change (as well as finish animating) to be added to my piece.. so technically I did start. A one minute piece in 5 weeks... seems impossible.


I really want to present myself as a competent and capable artist and person, but every time I open my mouth recently I say something stupid, unwittingly rude, or just plain futz up what I was going to say. I'm a total basket case really. One minute I am collected and confident, the next I've tripped over my own feet... again.. for the fourth time in twelve seconds.
Alas my klutziness.

On the otherhand, maybe it's good I am so awkward. It makes other people look good =P ha. joshing.

I just really need to wake up and press forward. Once I do that, I'll be feeling much better. Get myself back into my swing, and everything will be berries. Now, if only I learned to stop paying with wooden nickels.

Black Tea and Randomness

Black tea is a delicious tea... if it has sufficient amounts of sugar in it. Otherwise it is harsh and biting and quite bitter. Now i know.

I am what you call a "tea maniac". Okay not really. I just honestly appreciate a good cup of tea.

Not alot going on today. Got my shot breakdown for the animation I'm to be working on over the next five weeks. A one minute peice in five weeks? Crazy you say? Yes, yes I am. I'll upload some images once I get some, I can't promise any video. I might put it up here, since my blog is by no means front page news to anyone. Thats good though. Anyway, the piece is to be done in watercolors, and paper cut outs from newspapers... silhouettes. I'm still working on ONE LINE for visuals. (The animation is done off of a poem) Villanelle create by my wonderful poet-boyfriend. It's filled with alot of interesting imagery... Hopefully I will do it some justice and he won't hate it.

Here's some old art I found in a tiny sketchbook of mine.

Character is Ajax, and wise/sage-like intellectual who is an Ovisian (my term for ram-people)

Seems to be a lot like a current character who is more developed that I....developed. -_-

this is Jericho- a badly scanned version of many of his expressions. No longer a Ram, but a half dune-cat half human genuis who surf's sand dunes and discovers lost treasures of a previous civilization on a post apocolyptic Earth

SO MUCH INSPIRATION

Okay people. Seriously. There is just SO MANY AMAZING ARTISTS OUT THERE. I found a new one, a director actually. His name is Giancarlo Volpe, and he is the director for Avatar, or one of them. Seeing his website and actually reading what he has to say about the animation world and his reactions to things are pretty refreshing. I mean think about it.





Someone say's director, you image a guy sitting at a cushy desk doing nothing but ordering people around. Come on. Everyone imagines that. But imagine a boss who is up and active and excited about what hes doing and is a tour de force of excitement- an inspiration to make you want to work harder. thats this guy.
Here's his Deviantart: http://fierymonk.deviantart.com/



BUT HEY- Everything is so copacetic right now, bee's knees really
... =) my 1920's research is Jake, going berries, its divine.



Also, I'm thinking of adopting a new vocabulary... can you tell?

http://home.earthlink.net/~dlarkins/slang-pg.htm

this here is a scrap i discovered I left on my OLD website himotoko.deviantart.com
Don't go there. Well. go there if u want. New stuff is on Ennuivee.deviantart.com

Wooow Vee got a blog.

Soooo. hey there ho there. I got me-self one o these fancy do-dads here. .... Hopefully I'll be able to share some interesting information for those who would like it. If you don't Know- I am an animator and an artist, so thats what this site is really going to deal with. My discoveries, maybe some sketches of mine. But it might be nice to actually start reliably posting information about myself and what I am doing in life at this moment. Maybe I'll look back on it later in life and smile, or maybe i'll wish i can burn the internet. =) only time will show me.

So yeah. Here's a bit of avatar fun for you.